Triple Treat

It's been months since I updated this Dream Journal. I've been busy with some others. I'm sad because most of the dreams that visited me through those months of absence have now sunken completely in the abyss of forgottendom (is there such a word hahahah).

Here are snippets from three dreams that I managed to retain in my memory:

1. My mom and dad visited me here in the US and I introduced them to my stepdaughter's mom (who I'm actually friends with) but my mom just politely said hi and seemed not to agree with my gesture.

It's hard to explain. Back home, this might be frowned at, but I treat my stepdaughter's "other" family (her real mom, her stepdad and her little sister) as my extended family. Our relationship is good (not just civil, but actually more than that)...we've formed this friendship that looks after first and foremost, my stepdaughter's welfare and well-being, and also after ourselves...it's just peaceful, warm and nice. I feel lucky. But I've also done my part as much as they have done theirs. The only thing I'm worried about sometimes is my parents' concerns. They are quite traditional and conservative. I think it's my mom's fear of me getting hurt, or things going ugly. But I still yearn to make her understand that it's all okay. I still fear that she won't understand. Especially when the time comes that they might all meet.

2. We had a small gathering somewhere back home, a beachfront. It was huge. And I found myself admiring the view and the sunset while lounging on a beach chair And then I was told that they were our property. But in that dream I was leaving soon, for USA. And in my heart I was regretting a little bit having to leave that paradise and eventually being nowhere close to it.

This dream speaks for itself. Oh the comfort, resources and stature I gave up and left to pursue the love of my life in America. For me, it's really the other way around. Big time.

3. We were attending a fiesta in the Philippines. Shuttling from dad's ancestral house to mom's ancestral house...it was chaotic with all the guests. I remember walking in a pathway were there's so many people celebrating, it smelled like smoke from the caterers' warmers (and live cooktops -- sizzling beef and stuff? Mongolian?). Then mommy called me to tell my dad that she needs reinforcement from the caterer in the other house. she needs some eggs cooked/fried.

Weird. But a typical slice of fiesta life back home. I don't think my mom will ask help from the other caterer though. Sometimes, mom's food is the rescuer when the others run out.

What do all of the above tell me about what occupies my subconscious? Am I weighed down by the past and the home I wish to carry with me every I go? Is that good or bad?